Hello MotherGoof, Hello FatherGoof, Greetings from Camp...

GoofBoy flew off to camp today, he will be gone for four weeks. I expect he will have a fantastic time. I am hoping, perhaps in vain, that he will take a few minutes off from wedgie contests and staying up late with the other boys making flatulence sounds and write to us. To inspire him, I shared an early missive I sent Bubbe Goof from camp when I was about his age.

June 28, 1978

Dear Mother,

I have been deceived about this camp. There are a great many children here and you know how I feel about other children. After you dropped me off, I tried to sign up for library. I was informed that this was impossible.

Instead, I was forced to play dodgeball. Thankfully, I was immediately pummeled in the head and my glasses broke so I didn't have to play anymore. But when I asked again to go to the library, it was again denied. I am beginning to suspect that there is no library on these premises.

Unfortunately, tape was procured for my glasses, and my participation in outdoor activities is apparently mandatory. After lunch we are going on a "nature walk," which I believe is a euphemism for death march.

I despise this place. Please be prompt at 3PM pickup.

Sincerely,
Your Son

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