Fey Troubles: Must See TV vs. My Marriage

It has been a long time since I’ve needed to hide magazines from the women in my life. But then Vanity Fair put Tina Fey on the cover, but worse - every Thursday night she tests my marriage.

I’ve long been a big fan Tina Fey fan; starting long before the Sarah Palin resemblance propelled her to international prominence. I was enthralled back when she was the SNL news anchor. But what sealed it was when, during an episode of Thirty Rock she was in a video conference, saw herself and said, “My eyes are so far apart, I look like Admiral Akbar.”

A reference to Admiral Akbar, leader from Mon Calamari and commander of the rebel fleet! For a Star Wars obsessed guy -

WOW!
Sigh.
"You had me at Akbar."

This isn’t just liking Star Wars this is true dorkdom (a reference to General Viers would probably make me foam at the mouth).

But here is the thing. I won’t say my wife gets jealous exactly. But…

I mentioned once that I thought Maura Tierney was “talented.” Not “hot,” which my wife generally ignores. “Hot” is just lucky genetics, not a cause of concern to a wife.

Some time later my wife casually mentioned during a Maura Tierney scene on ER, “You can see that she is really heavily made-up. Look at her hands.”

Now, any joy at seeing Ms. Tierney on screen is overshadowed as I visualize hands that look like they belong to Admiral Akbar.

I don’t know what my wife might have on Tina Fey – I don’t want to think about it.

Worse, I might retaliate by criticizing Sportacus (while my wife seems to take an inordinate interest in watching Lazy Town, at least she isn’t writing Sportacus fan fiction.)

It would escalate from there, as my wife ruined Laurie Berkner for me…

I don’t want to see it go this way, so I’ll just keep my latest issue of Vanity Fair hidden. (Under the mattress is no longer viable – and a little creepy – fortunately, my office is a mess.) But at least in this case, when it is inevitably discovered I can legitimately say I had it for the articles – although that might only make things worse.

Baby Borrowers: Bad TV or Free Baby-Sitting?

Tonight The Baby Borrowers is premiering on NBC tonight - soon. Five teenage couples each take care of a baby, then a toddler, then a pre-teen, then a teenager, and then someone who is elderly. Relationships are tested, words are exchanged, and diapers are not...

Suffice to say, I won't be watching. Father Goof is no fan of reality TV to begin with, and this sounds truly dreadful (although a bit of schadenfraude watching other people suffer through parenthood does seem in order).

But what got me is Washington Post TV critic Tom Shales wrote, "...we don't get to know enough about the kinds of couples who would lend their infants to a piece of exploitainment like this..."

Quite frankly, that's a no brainer: Parents who want free baby-sitting!

The producers do not want the infants to die on them and will intervene on that front if necessary. If (as the posted video teaser suggests) the teenagers can't get the kids to sleep - so what? That's their problem (and in the meantime, I would have slept fine without a baby crying every few hours). The baby will sleep on his/her return.