For various reasons Father Goof sends his son to a private school. This requires carpooling, which creates an odd kind of extended family.
Because Father Goof is both the least gainfully employed and least useful adult member of this extended family, he gets the toughest carpool duty - afternoon pickup. Every afternoon I ask my son and his carpool buddy what they learned today. And every afternoon they reply in desultory fashion, "Nothing."
I keep thinking, for what I pay in tuition, I should get more than "Nothing." I should be amused, entertained. They should be regular Scheherazades back there regaling me with a 1001 Carpool Afternoons.
Better still, to really see my tuition dollars at work, I'd like the school to pick the Little Goof up by helicopter.